WARNING: This particular newsletter is about a controversial and potentially upsetting political event. I won't speak on politics often in these emails, but this one has been on my mind for a bit. Feel free to skip today's email if you're not interested. Next email will be about my new song dropping Monday 09/15/2025.
America is Strange
Around 12:15PM PDT on Wednesday, I sat down with 8-10 coworkers at lunch in the cafeteria with a takeout box of Korean bulgolgi (first time they've ever served this, don't you dare *rightfully* call me "privileged"). Being the obsessed musician/marketer that I am, I doze off for about 5 minutes to finish listening to a newly started music marketing podcast (this one here if you're curious).
Ok, Sony headphones off. Time to get back to the real world. I turn back to my coworkers & begin to tune into the conversation.
"He was shot this morning."
?
"Charlie Kirk was shot this morning"
Usually, this is when there is a period of "deafening silence" i.e. a brief time where the silence conveys more information than words ever could...but this silence was...different. The silence in contexts like these is usually a time of information absorption, a transition from denial to acceptance of the event at hand, and most recognizably, a time of grieving. Obviously, not all grieving is completed in public at one particular time, but some level of grieving is usually expected...Today was different.
There was no grieving in today's silence.
I wouldn't go so far to say that anyone at the table actively celebrated the news -- a father of 2 and husband being assassinated while attempting to have conversations with college students is, in my opinion, undeniably disturbing, and it is not something I, nor anyone I consider a colleague, friend, or family, would ever advocate for. Despite this, everyone at the table who was familiar with Charlie Kirk and his work was...smiling in confusion.
That includes me.
Why? If the situation we're describing here is so obviously terrible, and I'm supposedly so steadfast in my morals, then why is there any confusion, let alone a borderline sense of relief, that a father & husband is now dead.
My answer: because people are complex
Sometimes we laugh in these situations, whether it be because laughing is an effective coping mechanism in the face of tragedy or because of the absurd irony of the situation . Sometimes, we feel relief or a sense of justice when something terrible happens to people who wrong us or those we love. We cheer when the school bully gets put in his place (i.e. publicly humiliated and/or beaten). It is simply not possible to always observe a "bad thing" happen to an individual, and immediately express sympathy without consideration of any other context, let alone be empathetic, and expecting that out of every single person is foolish and unfair.
You are not strange for feeling sad about Charlie Kirk's death, but I don't think others are strange for feeling like justice has been served; that is a very human reaction. You damn sure are not strange if you have no idea what to feel.
America is strange, not you.
I write this letter for 2 reasons today
- I know that many of you may feel the same way, and I want to reassure you that you're not alone. You're not crazy, and you are definitely NOT a monster for feeling the way you do.
- My entire identity as an artist and a friend is built on a foundation of empathy & hope.
3 teens were shot dead in a Colorado high school, and it was the second biggest story that day. America is in a fucked up, confused place right. It's frightening to see so many people dive in the lava headfirst and burn others with the debris of the volcano. It's devastating to see people reject parenthood out of a fear of a bullet being lodged in their children's skulls during their afternoon art class. But we're all in this together. You are not feeling this fear and confusion alone.
We are currently seeing how hot the lava really is, but things will change for the better soon. You must have faith.
It gets better than this.
Stay safe,
Stephen (Suti~Tooti)
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